Influencing People
By
Daniel N Brown
Copyright 2005 Daniel N Brown
Every day we're confronted with situations where
we need to influence, lead and persuade people.
From persuading your children to clean their
room, to convincing your boss to give you a
raise. It's all about influence.
Our ability to deal successfully with people
determines the quality of our business life, our
family life, and our social life. Ultimately,
our success in life and in any endeavor will be
solely determined by how well we influence other
people. Our ideas will never see the light of
day if we can't persuade others why it's such a
great idea.
Excellent influencing skills require a healthy
combination of interpersonal, communication,
presentation, and assertiveness techniques. But,
there is no right way, nor is there only one way
to influence others. Everything is a factor when
influencing people.
Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and
Influence People" gives an incredible insight
into human behavior. If you've never read this
classic book I highly recommend it. There are
also plenty of other great books out there on
people skills and human nature. It would do us
all good to gain more understanding on this
vital topic.
We must, absolutely, have a proper understanding
of people and their nature if we are ever to win
others to our way of thinking. When you gain a
proper understanding, then, and only then, can
you become a successful person of influence.
Influencing is about being able to move things
forward, without pushing, forcing or telling
others what to do. It's the ability to work
everything at your disposal, both verbal and
non-verbal communication, to create the impact
you want, rather than letting things just
happen.
To best influence people you must have an
understanding of yourself and the effect or
impact you have on others. It' s about knowing
how others perceive you. It can sometimes be
looked at as the ability to finesse another
person. They become persuaded, often
unconsciously, into seeing and understanding
your view .
If you can make people understand your view then
they will be far more willing to at least meet
you halfway. Even more so if you make them feel
acknowledged, understood and appreciated. They
may even end up doing or agreeing to something
they wouldn't have previously done because they
feel good about making the choice.
Now, here's a big secret to influencing people;
make the other person feel important and the
more they will respond to you. It's human nature
for people to want to be recognized and to feel
like "somebody." It's been said about
recognition, "Babies cry for it and grown men
die for it."
People will always respond in a negative way to
you if you treat then like a nobody, or talk
down to them. I see this all the time,
particularly in families. Parents can't seem to
understand why their kids disrespect them. Often
times, the parents are talking down to their
kids, belittling them, making them feel like
their ideas are stupid, and making them feel
unimportant.
People could gain a lot of ground by first
listening to others without judgment and
criticism, hearing what is important to them,
and hearing what will move them. When you know
what will move them, you will then know how to
move them because you will be able to tell them
what they want to hear. You can simply show them
how they can get what they want by doing what
you want.
Again, our successes in life will be greatly
determined by how well we influence other
people. So, we need to learn all we can about
human nature and obtain great people skills so
we may win others to our way of thinking. When
you gain a proper understanding of human nature
and hone your people skills, then will you
become a mighty successful person of influence.
About the author:
Daniel N. Brown
is an entrepreneur and teacher of biblical
success principles. Get your FREE report
entitled, "How to Receive from God" when you
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